What works?

Before the negotiation

  • Respect your partner enough to find out something about them in advance.
  • Plan: anticipate possible objections and questions.
  • Formulate alternatives, ideas and solutions (don’t leave it up to your partner).

Preparing your strategy:

  • Define exactly what you want and how you will ask for it.
  • Be specific.
  • Keep it as short and concise as possible.
  • Cite technical skills.
  • Cite relevant experience.
  • Cite your availability for what you want.

During the negotiation

Approach: negotiate in good faith (and assume your partner is, until proven wrong)

  • Understand what your partner needs.
  • See things from your partner’s viewpoint.
  • Help your partner solve their problems.
  • Help your partner succeed in their job/project/goals.
  • Offer alternatives. Give something to get something.
  • Listen carefully.

Your style:

  • Persistent (but not aggressive)
  • Polite and friendly (non-threatening)
  • Open, honest, transparent
  • Be sensitive to different cultures and genders: what you think is neutral might be insulting to others.

After the negotiation

  • Get a time commitment.
  • Follow up in writing.

Bottom line

  • Even a “small yes” is a win. It can be the basis of a broader agreement.
  • Both sides should feel “they got a good deal” afterwards.
  • If it doesn’t work, remember: continuing relationships are valuable (no one can foresee the future; things change).